they mean well

I stopped talking to him a long time ago – more than a year ago now. It doesn’t hurt so much anymore, the distance is good.

But he’s struggling, in a public way, and they all wrote to me to tell me. I can’t help but watch what has to be the most elegant, most gorgeous, most painfully beautiful trainwreck in history. They think I want to join them in the schadenfreude, and in a way I do, but mostly it just reopens everything. I just want to make it all better, I want to tell him I still care, that someone still loves him, even if only from afar.

Can’t do that, though. Would just make things worse. So I’ll post here, and quote more lyrics, and hope that somehow, through the magical ether of the internet, he hears it.

The moon shines on the sea
No one here but me
The moon is full and low
And all I want to know
Is where are you now?

(Jesse Harris, Where Are You Now?)